The third file in this series of A-Z posts, features the Cybermen.
The Cybermen are a race of highly intelligent but emotionless cyborgs from the planet Mondas, Mondas being the twin to Earth.
Overtime, as the bodies of the inhabitants of Mondas grow weak, their Cybernetic scientists devise a way for them to survive. And thus all humans apart from their brains, are converted within a machine casing and all emotions, (which are seen as being negative) are removed. With all sentiment now eliminated, the Cybermen's only goal becomes to convert or destroy.
And so I bring to you and all your metal friends, the ultimate pictorial guide on planning a classic invasion.
STEP 1: Land on Earth using a small spacecraft so as to not attract too much attention.
Your home planet is dying and so you need the Earth as a new home-world. An arctic base in the south pole will be a good starting point. But remember that is quite cold there, so do not forget your Balaclavas. If you do not have a balaclava, a pair of tan coloured tights will do just as well. You will also need a massive metal lamp to place on the top of your head, possibly to add height, and to give you light to see in the dark.
STEP 2: Attack the Moon with tin spaceships. Get imprisoned on the ice planet of Telos and at the same time, get yourself a new and updated look. Cybermen do not eat food but adding a cheese grater to your chest and black feeding tubes to your outfit, will complete that new Cybernetic style, which will be the envy of aliens everywhere. Oh, and get imprisoned again.
|Building a Cyberman's Spaceship using a Mr Kipling's foil casing.|
STEP 3: London is notoriously cold, so after failing to attack a ship in deep space and becoming completely incoherent, zip up your silver jacket, strap on your cheese graters and climb out of the sewers of London to do absolutely nothing but walk around for a bit before being killed,
Enjoy a Swedish Massage. After all, the fun times won't last for long
|"We Meet Again...Doctor"|
An actual line from 1982's "Earthshock"
|I was wrong, more fun times for the Cybermen in "Silver Nemesis" 1988|
Then when you are finished, your classic reign will be over, you will all be dead and you will have achieved absolutely nothing.
Your Lord and Master